We will always remember Ellie for her love for others, her creativity, sensitivity, and delight in life! Ellie's light has spread far and wide... may it continue to shine in our hearts.

Monday, December 31, 2007

We have arrived...

I just wanted to let you all know that we have arrived in Florida - very close to on time and with all of our luggage! (The one time that I am totally prepared with three days worth of clothes for the whole family in one carry-on... you gotta love Murphy...)

Because of a previous airline malfunction, Kathy was upgraded to first class on one of the flights, and she generously offered her seat to me! So my flight from Minneapolis to Orlando was spent in style. The man next to me didn't speak to me AT ALL, and I was wined and dined in comfort! I actually read a whole book yesterday. I'm not sure when I have done that last! The only down-side to the whole thing was that once I was finally alone, with nothing to do, the past couple of weeks kind of piled up on top of me all at once. I didn't exactly sob into my gourmet meal or anything, but there was this horrible, heavy "OH MY GOODNESS WHAT JUST HAPPENED, and why on earth are we going back to the place where there are so many memories?" kind of moment. The moment eventually passed, and now I am thankful to be here and looking forward to spending time with family and friends.

Thank you all for your prayers for Ethan. He seems to be doing pretty well, but he has made a few comments that show me how fragile he still is. While still at the airport in Montana, Ethan said "we are going to Ellie's world... you know, where our old house is. That's Ellie's world. My world is my bedroom (in Montana)." Then in the airport bathroom in Orlando he said "You know, I'm an idiot sometimes. (Something that he picked up from a movie and he's not supposed to say.) I hurt my Ellie sometimes." He had gone through a difficult stage about two years ago when he had a hard time being gentle with his sister, and was remembering it as our steps took us closer to that past life. I carefully explained to him that it happened a long time ago and that he had been so gentle and careful with Ellie since she has been sick, and particularly before she died. The poor little guy is feeling the same kind of trepidation that we are when it comes to re-visiting old haunts. I am hoping that it will just all be part of the grieving/healing process for us all. Please pray that we will have the wisdom to lead Ethan through this time while the grief is still so fresh for us. Thank you.

I will probably be offline for some days now, but you never know... Sometimes the mood just strikes! Feel free to leave comments as you wish, and when I am taking breaks from the computer, know that Loretta is still checking and will post all comments. Then I will read them later.


At 9:36 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

so glad you arrived safely to Florida. that Ethan is so precious and we will continue to pray for him as he deals and goes through his own mourning process.we think of you all and keep you are in our prayers each and everyday.love simons family

At 10:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I feel like I know you so well, but I really don't know you at all. I have told you several times about our baby Levi being stillborn 10 days before he was due. I know your situation is so different, but losing a child no matter the age leaves an incredible void and hurt that only the Lord can fill. Our children still love there baby brother so much. We have a picture of him on our refrigerator. He is still a part of our lives. All that Ethan is saying is so good. He is opening up and you all are having such wisdom. I remember my 3 year old saying "I want Levi to come out of that hole." What honesty, but that is all part of his grief process. Now ,almost 2 years later, we still talk about Levi and how we look forward to seeing him again and what he would be doing now. I think those moments of Ethan talking now will turn into open memories of the joy Ellie brought to your lives and the joy you have to look forward to. I pray that the Lord will continue to comfort and give you peace as you grieve. God is so good and even when we don't understand ~ isn't it wonderful to be able to KNOW that everything will be okay. WHY? because God is GOD!!! You are in my prayers and my heart is breaking for you, but joy WILL come again! Hard times ~ yes! But God is all we need!


At 11:03 AM, Anonymous Judy, Jon and Karina said...

Dear Sarah,
Thank you for your updates. Interesting that you, John, and Ethan had similiar feelings about FL. Praising God for the care He has given you. And will give you!

I Thess. 2:19 - "for what is our hope, or joy, or crown of rejoicing? Are not even ye in the presence of our Lord Jesus Christ at his coming?"

At 11:21 AM, Blogger Alyssa said...

This is my first time reading your blog....even though I've known about Ellie for a long time. I grew up in Mexico and spent a lot of time with Ginger....I'll remember her in my prayers. The loss of a child is something that I hate thinking about and for that reason I have ignored your blog. How selfish of me....from now on I commit you to prayer everyday. I hope your time in Florida goes well.

At 1:34 PM, Anonymous Jen Johnson said...

Sarah.....go enjoy your hubby for a few days, you deserve it! Rejuvenate your soul and find strength in each other.

Loretta.....we love ya and are thinking about you! We hope you find comfort in your new home. Get your sled ready! When my teeth are healed we'll be knockin!

At 5:47 PM, Blogger Sheila said...

I'll be praying especially for Ethan. I always have the urge to say 'Wow.' after I read your post. You are an amazing family, and I am so glad you have shared Ellie's story with us.

Keeping you in my prayers,

At 6:15 PM, Blogger Kristie said...

We are continuing to pray for all of you and your family. Franz and I will be out of town on the 15th but wanted to make it to the service so bad. We will be sure and get together after y'all have had some time alone. We love you guys so much!! Kristie
Loretta..please know you are on our prayer list also! Thanks for all you have done for our dear friends!

At 6:28 AM, Blogger Barbara said...

I came over to your blog via a link and feel that having just read what I've read I can't just leave without commenting.

I have a 10 year old daughter with the same name. She's away today and I feel such a need to hug her.

I'm so sorry for your loss, and what a loss. Your Ellie sounds like she was a wonderful girl and how lucky she was to have such a loving family around her. God bless you and keep you all through these times.

At 7:22 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dearest Sarah,

You are not forgotten and every night we lift your family up in prayer. As I was laying down before midnight(37 and always asleep before the new year :), my heart just ached for how you might be feeling... Praise God for Ellie's life and what a TREMENDOUS impact she had on so many.....Thank you for updating us all still, you are so selfless! I look forward to the day of meeting your family and telling you in person what a testimony to Christ your family is...We love you Skees family!!!

The Haviland's

At 9:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can't imagine what you're going through, but just trying to pray you through it....Les

At 1:42 PM, Anonymous Lindsay said...

I just wanted to send my thoughts and prayers to you and your family. I hope you all had a happy and peaceful Christmas and New Years.
Much Love,
Lindsay Montross
Winter Springs, FL

At 6:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Praying for you and thinking about you....My heart goes out to little Ethan. He is so brilliant! It is absolutely amazing what our young children capture in their minds. Sometimes my daughter says for me what I have not been able to put into words. They see things so clearly at times. How real they are, hugh? I will be praying especially for him and that you and John will know how to guide him during this time and that he will continue to talk with you about what is going on in his precious little heart and mind. It is fantastic how he expresses himself!!! Praying you will have what you need each moment of these days ahead...

At 8:55 PM, Blogger Mrs. Rabe said...

Thank you that you are still updating us. Know that you are in our thoughts and in our prayers.

May this time with family and friends bring healing and hope to all your hearts!

The Rabe Family

At 9:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Keeping you all in our prayers, especially little Ethan, as we can only imagine how hard it must be for him to cope with. We love you all!

At 12:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

we were trying to figure out why you were not returning to Florida to live right away and then reading your latest post we understood because of Ellie's World. Our prayers are that as you work thru the grieving you will be able to move back to Ellie's world to fellowship with those of us that still live here and love you guys. We are so amazed at you and John and your openess and sharing your world and Ellie's world with us. We praise God for your lives daily.

At 2:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know you personally, but I feel as if I do.

You are an amazing family and I know that GOD has great things planned for you in 2008.

Continuing to pray in Miami.

Conni B.

At 8:59 PM, Blogger cndymkr said...

I wish I knew what to say. I've read every word and cried countless tears today. My heart breaks for you and your family. I wish you peace. You, your family and your daughter will be in my prayers. Thank you for sharing her story with me.

At 1:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Back in "Ellie's world"... we are so saddened by the loss and so are praying for ourselves and for you, Ellie's dear family. Each time we come back to your blog we see her sweet face and beautiful eyes looking back at us, and we have to remember that she is gone all over again. As you return to "Ellie's world", we can only imagine what you must be feeling, partly expecting her to come running around the corner, or hearing her voice calling for you. The smells are very difficult. They bring floods of memories, as if they were only moments ago. We are lifting you up in prayer and we are missing Ellie with you.

The Whitaker Family

At 3:31 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Still praying for you. Don't know what else to say. Just praying.

At 9:10 AM, Blogger LindaSueBuhl said...

Oh Ethen my young friend - may you recall all the good times. Sarah - as always thank you for continuing to share your lives with us - we do continue to pray for your family and give praise for the number of lives impacted by your openness during Ellie's cancer battle.
nothing else to say - except once again - admiration for you family (Loretta has got to be one of the best people ever )
Bless you all - no guilt or remorse is benefical - you fought the good fight.

At 11:07 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sarah , myprayers are with you and your family your such a strong woman. Thank you so much for the kind words I know Raen felt the same way. Crystal


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