A message from Sarah
Last night we settled in at the hospital. John made countless trips to the car to bring up the loads of things I had packed. Hey, a girl's gotta have her stuff... besides, Ellie's just like her mamma - we must feel at home wherever we go (perhaps remnants of my past semi-nomadic lifestyle?) We are now comfortably ensconsed in our little nest - complete with throw pillows and a lamp (you KNOW that I can't live in flourescent light...).
So far we have had two of the nurses that we are already familiar with, and we even got the biggest room on the floor, so life isn't all that bad. :-) Ellie had a bone marrow aspiration and biopsy this morning. She was nervous about the idea, but she was calm and the drugs did their job. I only stayed in the room until she fell asleep, but John remained by her side through the whole proceedure. She is now coming out of the groggy stupor, watching TV and eating slushies. The nurse will come in and start the chemo in a few minutes. A special bonus here at the hospital is that our Dr. got his degree in marine biology before he became an oncologist, so we have gotten extra special help and advise on our new fish tank.
Ethan had a hard time last night when we told him that he had to spend the night with Stan and Pat. He loves being at their house, but he is now afraid that when he goes he might not come home for weeks. When the hospital called to tell us that there was a room available, Ethan was so upset. The song that was playing on our sterio at the time was Twila Paris' "Do I trust you, Lord?" so I held Ethan while he cried and gently danced around the front room to the music. Later, when it was time to go Ethan started crying again. We sat on the floor in a corner of the kitchen and prayed that God would help him. He asked me if God would go with him, and then he wanted it know if God was bigger than Ellie, me, and EVEN Daddy. After assuring him that yes, God is the biggest and would be with hiim the whole time, we sang "My God is so BIG" and then he cheerfully kissed me goodbye and calmly went with Papi and Bubbie. I was so proud of him and thankful that we can trust God to take care of Ethan as well. I have been so burdened for Ethan's emotional state during all of this, but God clearly impressed on my heart that if we can trust him with Ellie during this time, that we can certainly trust that He will take care of Ethan as well.
I just wanted to thank all of you who have been praying for us and thinking of us during this past month. It means more to us than we can ever convey to you. I just wanted to leave you with a verse that God has used to comfort my heart. Isaiah 40:11 "He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to His heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young." Ellie and Ethan have been held close to the heart of their Shepherd, and I have been led so gently over the roughest terrain. (And I suspect that this verse also applies to daddy sheep in situations such as these. God has given John the most amazing strength - he has been my greatest comfort during this time.) God has been answering your prayers in the most wonderful way.