Late Night Talks...

Hi everyone! Sorry I've not posted in a while. We have been doing well, but busy. I've been trying to cram everything in that I need to do while Ellie is feeling well before the next cycle starts. Ellie has been feeling great...eating well and having lots of energy. The trick is keeping her from burning off all of the calories we put into her! Tomorrow morning Ellie goes in for bone marrow biopsies, then she should be going in for chemo Wednesday or Thursday. I'll let you know...

We have found that Ellie is still having some trouble with sadness at night. I think that's just how it goes...you finally rest from the activity of the day and all of the thoughts you've kept at bay come rushing in at once. We have been trying to get Ellie down at a decent hour (somehow during these months her bedtime keeps creeping later and later) but sometimes she just needs some talk time and occasionally a good cry. There are times that we just need to pray with Ellie and help her to think about good things and ask God to help her not to be afraid, and other times we need to talk things through. The other night Ellie started crying at bed time and began talking again about dying. Because I lost my dad, Ellie started worrying that John or I might die before she does, and the thought was too much for her to imagine. I told her that the thing I learned from losing my dad was that as painful as it was, I was able to go on...and be o.k. God was enough for me, and would be for her too should that ever happen. And then that sweet little girl looked me in the eyes and asked me what would happen if she went to Heaven first. With tears in my eyes, I looked right back at her and told her that I would be o.k. - and somehow I knew that it was true. She smiled the same wonderfully peaceful smile that she did the night we prayed about her dying in her sleep, and wiped my tears with her sleeve. We talked about the Holy Spirit living inside of us, and that the Bible calls Him our Comforter - that when painful things happen, He is the One who comforts us and gives us peace. Just one more difficult, but oh so special late night talk.

Thanks so much for checking in and praying. Please remember John tomorrow as he's in with Ellie during the procedure - it's at 10:00 a.m. I will let you know when we know what the schedule is for the week.