March 19, 1994....
15 years ago today, we were married! In so many ways, I can't believe that it's already been 15 years, and in other ways it feels like a lifetime. How could I not have been born knowing this person who knows me better than I even know myself? He understands exactly what I mean even when I utterly fail at my attempts in communication. He manages to find something beautiful in me even on my ugliest days. He balances me in the most wonderful of ways. He chooses to stay with me on the bad days, or weeks, or months. Our marriage is not perfect, but I don't expect that it ever can be, given our humanness and all. What it is, is uniquely ours. It is the life that we continue to build together. And on this special anniversary, I just want to publicly thank John for choosing me. For loving me. For holding me so tightly that I feel that I will never be afraid again. And for holding me so loosely that I live with complete freedom to be myself. If he gives me nothing else for the rest of my life, that will be enough.
Because it's a special day, you know that there has to be a song! :-) I've been saving the song "We Will Dance" by Steven Curtis Chapman, for just this occasion. It says exactly what I would like to say to John today...
(click "standalone player")
I'm so sorry that I can't be with you today... our first anniversary apart! I love and miss you so very much!
All my love,