Ellie's been in Heaven for ONE YEAR

Thank you so much for participating in our week of giveaways! You've all been great. We drew the final name out of the hat this morning. The person who will be receiving the Ellie pillow is...

Amy Merrill from Davenport, Florida

This was her comment:

"You and your family have been a part of my life for more years than you realize. I have never met you or Ellie but my daughter, Lorenza, had lunch with Ellie when she was about 5. My mom met up with Stan for lunch somewhere on the outskirts of Orlando (Sanford I believe - it has been many years and my memory fails me). My mom knows him from church - she attends the chapel at NAS Mayport. Once Ellie was diagnosed, my mom told me about the blog and reminded me about Lorenza and Ellie having that meal. My daughter will be 10 in January (I have a wonderful son as well who turned 4 in July). I have read and kept up with your blog ever since. But you are more intertwined in my life than that lunch Lorenza had with Ellie or my mom knowing Stan. Lorenza's dad is Colombian. On our first family trip to Colombia my mom told me the story of a missionary that was taken from Panama by Colombian rebels and how the church was praying for him each week. She was petrified of my going to Colombia - especially with Lorenza who had just turned 2. It was through your blog I realized who that missionary was. The last little link was discovered last year. My husband of five years and I had started to get back in touch with people we had gone to high school with and my husband reconnected with one of his very good friends from high school who had married his high school girlfriend. As my family spent time with their family, my mom asked me if I knew the wife's maiden name - my mom thought maybe she could remember her from high school. I said 'her name was Hope Skees and my mom responded 'As in Ellie Skees???' I later confirmed with Hope that she is indeed related to John.

Your blog has made me smile. It has made me cry. There were times when I could not understand the magnitude or difficulty of the decisions you were making. I am, by nature, a very private person and have never commented before but I felt compelled to write this evening. Ellie has touched so many lives. I continue to marvel at your family’s ability to cope with this loss.

Now that I have said all that I find I am suddenly at a loss for words. I just want you to know that Ellie has touched so many peoples lives and I wanted to thank you for allowing us to share your life."

Congratulations, Amy! Thank you so much for your comment... it really is a small world. I am so thankful that you have chosen to walk this journey with us. Thank you for that. Please email me with your address and I will send you your pillow!

I will be mailing out all of the prizes on Monday. :-)

Edith "Mema" Tyler has so graciously agreed to share with us all on this very special day. I'm sure that you will be as touched and filled up to the brim with the love of God as I am! I just wanted to first say how blessed I have been by all of the incredible comments you have left. Mema mentions how she has also taken comfort from comments over the course of this journey that we have traveled together. That is the reason why I wanted to have a guest blogger on this day. We have all been knit together into a little community on this blog. You have gotten to know one another through the messages that you leave. I believe that nothing honors God more than when we love one another. And in that same spirit, it is the very thing that we can do to honor Ellie's memory as well! My Ellie girl's greatest desire in life was for those that she loved to live in harmony one with the other.

Please welcome our guest blogger, Mema!

Lamentations 3:21-26
"This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in Him. The Lord is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeked him. It is good that a man (woman) should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the Lord."

Micah 7:8
"Rejoice not against me, O mine enemy: for when I fall I shall arise; when I sit in darkness the Lord will be a light unto me."

Romans 8:18
"For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us."

Yesterday as I thought about this special honor I did not know what to share, so let me start with Ellie. I first heard about Ellie from my daughter-in-law Laura Tyler (Wingo) whose parents are missionaries with New Tribes. She called and told me to pray for Ellie and sent the blog site. At that time I had no idea the impact Ellie and her family would have on my life. I shared with the adult Sunday School class I teach about Ellie and we put her on our prayer list. The girls at work have prayed for Ellie many times and have sat and cried with me as I have read and experienced the journey with you and others. From the first time I read the blog I was overwhelmed with sadness that a mother and father would probably lose their daughter to cancer. As I followed the journey I was always rejoicing when Ellie would bounce back after being in ICU. The pictures, thoughts and experiences that were shared spoke volumes of the Lord and the amazing grace and strength He put into your lives. Mostly I believe I have loved the pictures and videos of Ellie dancing. That is where I adopted the phrase, "I will sing when I do not feel like singing and dance when I do not feel like dancing." What a beautiful sight to behold as Ellie would swirl around to the music and at those moments I felt like she could feel hope, joy, and peace. Lost in the movement, the sound and rhythm of the music. That always is how I feel when I can sit back against the Lord and feel His heartbeat and drink from His cup. Well Ellie is doing just that. Only now her dance and song is one the Angels can not do because it is the dance of the "REDEEMED!" What a wonder she must be to the Lord as He watches her in His presence. Dance on Ellie!!!

What you have shared is to numerous to tell how it has impacted not just my life but others. I have lost my Dad to cancer, my grandmother (my friend and confidant) and my sister, Sarah who took her life 5 years ago. Of all these losses, Sarah was my greatest. She was my friend, a part of me that is now missing. After a long time of depression and being diagnosed with MS, she told me, "I will love you till I die." and the next day I got the call. As tragic as it is, I know that God has been merciful and kind and allowed me to stay sheltered in Him. I do not know how to grieve for her, but many times in reading your blog I have thought, that is how I feel. Your insight to what you feel and your honesty has helped me tremendously. Sharing your pain, grief, joys, the lows and highs, the posts of others, and your ability to write has increased my faith and trust in the Lord, my Savior.

Watching the last hours of Ellie's life, seeing them, and reading the post are forever imprinted in my mind. Not in a bad way, but a hopeful way. As I too want to see the Lord one day. Ellie will forever live in our hearts, with and without hair. Your honesty and insight with your son, Ethan and the way he related and still carries Ellie in his life, and the pain and strength of your husband will forever give us hope and strength. One of my favorite pictures is of Ellie lying on her Dad's back, and Ethan when he shaved his head. They are bonded and will one day get to dance together in Heaven.

So on the day of Ellie's death, there is life! She will forever live on in my heart, and I will always remember to dance. Thank you for allowing me the honor of sharing your daughter, your family and your life. May God bless you, John and Ethan with His unending love, peace and grace. May He give you comfort and peace on this day. May in your tears, you also have joy and in your pain, have healing in Christ. And one day you too will dance before the Lord.

With much love and Prayers,
Edith (Mema) Tyler
South Carolina

There is nothing more that I can add to that. But I would like to finish this post off by giving you one more message. This one is from Ellie.

Back in October, 2007, after we came back from NY where we discovered that the cancer was growing again, Ellie was having difficulty sleeping one night. I put some music on her little MP3 player and she lay there listening to it with headphones on. She was lying between John and me. Her dad was fast asleep, and I was desperately wishing to be. But Ellie kept wiggling and poking buttons on the player. And then she put the headphones on me and made me listen to two songs. She said "Mommy, I want you to put these on the blog." One of them was Celine Dion's "A New Day" and I gave that one to you just after she died. I promised Ellie that I would share the songs with you, and I have been saving this one for just the right moment.

It is Amy Grant's "Lead Me On." I found it of great interest that the song makes direct reference to the suffering of the Jews, God's chosen people. It talks about their years in slavery as well as the horrors of the Holocaust. Ellie really didn't understand all of that. But something in this song spoke to her little heart that night - I think that she identified with the suffering and fear of death, and looked to the hope of eventual freedom being offered.

So here it is, as I promised Ellie, her special message to you:

LEAD ME ON
Written by Michael W. Smith

Shoulder to the wheel
For someone else's selfish gain
Here there is no choosing
Working the clay
Wearing their anger like a ball and chain.

Fire in the field
Underneath a blazing sun
But soon the sun was faded
And freedom was a song
I heard them singing when the day was done
Singing to the holy One.

Lead me on
Lead me on
To a place where the river runs
Into your keeping, oh.

Lead me on
Lead me on
The awaited deliverance
Comforts the seeking...lead on.

Waiting for the train
Labeled with a golden star
Heavy hearted boarding
Whispers in the dark
"Where are we going--is it very far?"

Bitter cold terrain
Echoes of a slamming door
In chambers made for sleeping, forever
Voices like thunder in a mighty roar
Cry to the Lord.

Lead me on
Lead me on
To a place where the river runs
Into your keeping, oh.

Lead me on
Lead me on
The awaited deliverance
Comforts the seeking...lead on.

Man hurts man
Time and time, time again
And we drown in the wake of our power
Somebody tell me why.

Lead me on
Lead me on
To a place where the river runs
Into your keeping, oh.

Lead me on
Lead me on
The awaited deliverance
Comforts the seeking...lead on.